I would love to tell you that I have this thing all figured out. Motherhood, marriage, ministry, friendships...but honestly, I have to tell you, I have not got a clue. I feel like a complete failure most of the time in every single area. I learned so much this past week, and at the same time, I realized how little I know. A very challenging set of questions was put to us during one of the sessions. The speaker asked, "Who are you, and what breaks your heart?" I wrote that down in my notes and stared at it for the rest of the day. Who am I? What breaks my heart? What am I passionate about, what is it that brings tears to my eyes and causes me to want to jump to action? I honestly don't have a fully formed idea of what the answer to that is. Even though I don't know exactly what that answer is, I know that God does. God has the amazing ability to be able to see past who we are to who we were created to be. When He called Simon, he was just kind of a stumbling, bumbling fisherman. He asked a lot of dumb questions and got a lot of things wrong, but Jesus immediately saw his potential. He renamed him Peter, which means rock.
Matthew 16:3 When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say that the Son of Man is?” 14 “Well,” they replied, “some say John the Baptist, some say Elijah, and others say Jeremiah or one of the other prophets.” 15 Then he asked them, “But who do you say I am?” 16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.” 17 Jesus replied, “You are blessed, Simon son of John, because my Father in heaven has revealed this to you. You did not learn this from any human being. 18 Now I say to you that you are Peter (which means ‘rock’), and upon this rock I will build my church, and all the powers of hell will not conquer it. 19 And I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven."
Peter may not have know who he was, but he did know who Jesus was- the Messiah, the Son of the living God. Peter went on to write most of the New Testament and be a father of the Church, just as Jesus said.
Jesus knows who I am, I just need to know who He is, trust in who He is, and walk with Him daily. I will make lots of mistakes along the way, and ask a million stupid questions, but as long as I am willing, He can take my life and turn it into whatever He needs.
David, the shepherd boy who killed a giant and later became king, the one who God said was a man after His own heart- started out as a nobody. After he killed Goliath, King Saul offered him his daughters hand in marriage as a reward. How did David respond? "David, embarrassed, answered, “Do you really mean that? I’m from a family of nobodies! I can’t be son-in-law to the king.” (1 Samuel 18:18)
Do you know what God thinks of nobodies? He says: I’ll call nobodies and make them somebodies;
I’ll call the unloved and make them beloved. In the place where they yelled out, “You’re nobody!”
they’re calling you “God’s living children.” Romans 9:25 (MSG)
So, I'm not sure who I am, or what breaks my heart. I honestly don't have all that compassionate of a heart- it's something I'm working on. Here is what I do know. I know that I am a child of God, I know that as a young mom I long for close relationships with other ladies, I know that I love reaching out to girls and women and hearing their stories and finding out what makes them unique and special. I know that I love singing praises to the Lord and leading others in a time of worship. I know that I love reading and learning about the Word of God, and discussing it with others. I know that I love creating art. I think all of these are things that God has placed in my heart. It's all part of who I am.
Jesus knows who I am, I just need to know who He is, trust in who He is, and walk with Him daily. I will make lots of mistakes along the way, and ask a million stupid questions, but as long as I am willing, He can take my life and turn it into whatever He needs.
David, the shepherd boy who killed a giant and later became king, the one who God said was a man after His own heart- started out as a nobody. After he killed Goliath, King Saul offered him his daughters hand in marriage as a reward. How did David respond? "David, embarrassed, answered, “Do you really mean that? I’m from a family of nobodies! I can’t be son-in-law to the king.” (1 Samuel 18:18)
Do you know what God thinks of nobodies? He says: I’ll call nobodies and make them somebodies;
I’ll call the unloved and make them beloved. In the place where they yelled out, “You’re nobody!”
they’re calling you “God’s living children.” Romans 9:25 (MSG)
So, I'm not sure who I am, or what breaks my heart. I honestly don't have all that compassionate of a heart- it's something I'm working on. Here is what I do know. I know that I am a child of God, I know that as a young mom I long for close relationships with other ladies, I know that I love reaching out to girls and women and hearing their stories and finding out what makes them unique and special. I know that I love singing praises to the Lord and leading others in a time of worship. I know that I love reading and learning about the Word of God, and discussing it with others. I know that I love creating art. I think all of these are things that God has placed in my heart. It's all part of who I am.
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