I have to think about attitude and my thoughts when I am doing those things- my motives. I guess you could say it's a heart issue. The Bible tells us to do everything without complaining and arguing, but I would have to say that my heart and mind have a tendency to complain and argue.
Let's say, for instance, that I finally got the opportunity to sit down at the end of the day. Dinner is over, I have cleaned the kitchen, straightened up the house, and am just sitting down on the couch for the first time in what seems like a year when my husband says," Hey sweetie, can you please grab my wallet of the dresser upstairs?" While I will probably do it, my brain will be grumbling away and my body will probably show that I am not very happy. My mouth may even go so far as to make a smart remark. I know some of you would probably tell him where he could put his wallet, or ask him if his legs are broken, but that is not my style. I like people to think I'm selfless. Isn't that horrible?! It's really a fine line between selfless humility, and a self serving show.
I sit down to do my devotions and Bible study when all of the sudden everyone in the house has come down with a case of tourettet syndrome. Except instead of shouting curse words, they are all shouting some variation of the word "Mom!" So I get up and go find out what is going on. While saying something like, "For heaven sake, Lord, help me not to murder anyone today!"
So, am I really being unselfish and loving? Does the fact that I "do" or "act" all that matters in the end? Or is there a deeper issue at work here? Does the idea of loving unselfishly go beyond going through the motions of service?
I strive every day to do better. I pray that God will grant me patience. I ask that He will show me how to be truly grateful and thankful for the things and people I have been given. My children and my husband are precious gifts that bless my life in countless ways every day. I pray that God will help me to stop worrying and caring about what other people think of me so that I can act with pure motives. I am a work in progress.
People may be pure in their own eyes, but the LORD examines their motives. Proverbs 16:2
What do you think?